goodlooksamerica
prose, poetry, photography

rambles

I am shaking
not from this cold
the humming monster
in the corner
heaving frosty air -

I am shaking
from how my body
is mixing with the 
dew of the shadows
and I am alone,

forgotten -

they said to
love yourself
be the man underneath
you didn’t see

and I saw -

but to hope for
love in the underneaths
of someone’s veins,
their fingers that don’t 
fit nicely through yours

can see you.

is it so wrong-

o-h-yes:

boyhood

o-h-yes:

boyhood

september fire

second year, here i am
spark and catch fire
wildfire burning
my insides
this is yours
the hearth of chaos
and no sleep
i’m ready for you
this time
because blood
flowing through
watery veins,
channels of mine

I am here,

burning myself
alive.

Before I leave again,

I’m going to talk to you again and pretend you’re there because there still lies a comfort in acknowledging that you’re there, even if I’m just pretending. 

I found the last letter you ever gave me tonight, except I didn’t know it was the last letter because it was unopened in an envelope, stuck in the bottom of my shoebox where I’ve kept cards and notes from previous years as I was packing for school again. It was postmarked November 21st, 2013, almost a year ago. I sat back against the frame of the bed and looked at it - your name, your address, your handwriting with my name, my address, my apartment number. I wondered why I hadn’t opened the letter since I keep practically all handwritten things that have been given to me since high school. That’s when I realized that on that same week of the day the letter was sent, we broke up. In my head I already knew we were going to be broken up this week and didn’t so much as look at the letter you had sent. I simply dropped it into my box and decided it could wait for another time. 

And now, it’s here, in front of me. Your words, your concerns, your thoughts, all spilling towards me. You tried so hard to make things work and even if they didn’t work you wanted things to end right at least. But I still couldn’t do that. To be honest, this letter is an old scab that picks at my own emotions but at the same time I can come to see it as a piece of solace, maybe even a bit of a comfort. Even in the end you cared, all the way up to the last word you wrote. 

P.S. - Reply. Do not neglect my letter for homework, if possible

Nine months later, I did. It was too late by then to salvage anything, even friendship, but at least I could do what I’ve always held back in doing - tell you how I felt honestly for the first and last time. You were right in not waiting for me to reply and I’m glad you didn’t. 

Thanks for everything - hope college is good to you. 

XXXXX

vintagebooksdesign:

MURAKAMI POSTER COMPETITION

To celebrate the arrival of Haruki Murakami for Saturday’s London signing at Waterstone’s Piccadilly, we’re giving away ten beautiful posters for Colorless Tsukuru Tazaki and His Years of Pilgrimage.

To be in with a chance just Reblog this post and we’ll pick 10 lucky winners out of the hat.

The competition closes on Monday 1st September.

Back to school trim (y)

Back to school trim (y)

Two Pistols

And those two cranes spreading themselves across the skies like two pistols loaded and aimed at the moon, ready to shoot down the shooting stars and kill the light. The two cranes in the sky built to blind the skies and make us forget that there are worlds that live outside of our own heads, that the two cranes only build more light to clutter the beautiful things we forget that were once the guiding light, the North Star.

But the two cranes in the sky build, and bang, bang, they’ve got our dreams too.

anajkim:

I fell from a plane

08.29.14

i feel -

Read More

thisiscitylab:


If “Goldilocks and the Three Bears” were written today, bike-share stations would play the role of the porridge. A station that’s too full is a bad thing, because that means riders can’t return a bike there. A station that’s too empty is also a bad thing, because that means potential riders can’t rent from there. To keep members happy, you need to get the number of bikes at a station just right.
Operators know this as the "rebalancing" problem, and it’s not nearly as easy to resolve as it might seem. On the contrary, some of the world’s top mathematicians and computer scientists are addressing the challenge right now. In this week’s issue of Science, Vienna correspondent Chelsea Wald reports that as many as 30 researchers are devoting serious time to rebalancing—some in collaboration with bike-share operators in major cities.
The goal of this research is to derive algorithms directing the vans and trucks that bike-share operators use to shuffle bikes from station to station within a city. Trouble is, rebalancing is a moving target with several layers of complexity. You not only need to predict how many bikes a station will need at a certain time, but you need to minimize the (costly and time-consuming) movement of these vans and trucks—and you need to do it all while the system is in use.

-Balancing Bike-Share Stations Has Become a Serious Scientific Endeavor
[Graphic: Rainer-Harbach et al (2014)]

thisiscitylab:

If “Goldilocks and the Three Bears” were written today, bike-share stations would play the role of the porridge. A station that’s too full is a bad thing, because that means riders can’t return a bike there. A station that’s too empty is also a bad thing, because that means potential riders can’t rent from there. To keep members happy, you need to get the number of bikes at a station just right.

Operators know this as the "rebalancing" problem, and it’s not nearly as easy to resolve as it might seem. On the contrary, some of the world’s top mathematicians and computer scientists are addressing the challenge right now. In this week’s issue of Science, Vienna correspondent Chelsea Wald reports that as many as 30 researchers are devoting serious time to rebalancing—some in collaboration with bike-share operators in major cities.

The goal of this research is to derive algorithms directing the vans and trucks that bike-share operators use to shuffle bikes from station to station within a city. Trouble is, rebalancing is a moving target with several layers of complexity. You not only need to predict how many bikes a station will need at a certain time, but you need to minimize the (costly and time-consuming) movement of these vans and trucks—and you need to do it all while the system is in use.

-Balancing Bike-Share Stations Has Become a Serious Scientific Endeavor

[Graphic: Rainer-Harbach et al (2014)]